Friday, June 27, 2008

To all those who I lost….because of you or because of me

I liked you guys
And I thought you liked me too
And things could’ve gone on well
But you chickened out
Got lost in the labyrinth
Weaved in and out at will
Left me standing in the rain
Frowning
I went wrong too
Became a rug
Your shoeprints still linger
They say things happen for a reason, for the best too
Awesome!
So was this the best we could do?
I got tired
Some of you slipped away
For some, I opened my clenched fingers
And let fall
Into strangeness
We know each other no more
Memories tucked away in a musty corner
Familiarity paling like dissipating vapour
You found your way
I found mine
I wonder if they’ll ever intersect
And will I say ‘hi’ or will you slink into the crowd unnoticed
Will I glance at you steely and walk off
Or will you come running forward to shake my hand

Till then
Goodbye
I liked you before, then hated your existence.
But now
I’m cold
To your presence on this planet
My mind does not trace your movements anymore
You may become the Prime Minister in a few years
I might vote for you
Or I might not
My doors were open for a little while
Inching towards closure
Now they’re shut
Gigantic, black doors.
Shut.


Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Will he Wonky wonked out


Lit your way,
Cleared your clutter,
The junk was rotting,
You were relieved, happy even.
Me!! in a different light,
Attention!
Took it modestly, never expecting it to last,
Careful, cautious, my toes touched the water,
Hmmm....warm, nice, bubbly,
Let go,
Not too much,
Just a little,
Warmth and magnetism.
Cumbersome magic.
The end.
My toes touch ice,
The change in your eyes, the distance,
I keep away,
Not to offend,
Your "space,"
Want it?
Take it.
Here, I throw it in your face!
Shut your doors, latch your windows,
Pull on the black blanket and disappear,
In your prism of excess and waste,
Of many who will be smitten,
Dissipate.
While I disappear completely from your mind,
Lose me in them.
Maybe then you can forget.
And so can I.

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

Free from Colonialism

I want it back.
My life.
It's mine.
Has always been.
I just never realised it before.
It was held captive for eons.
By those who gave it to me.
By those who bound me with wires called "attachment."
By those who gave me a living to live a life which doesn't seem like mine sometimes.
By those who still eagerly hold a pencil over the map of my life.
Poised to make changes the minute I betray weakness.
To scratch out boundaries that I may transcend.
To contain me.
To keep me.

Today I decided for myself.
Like the rare times I've done before and faced the discord, the coldness, the isolation.
The same reaction thrown in my face.
How naive am I to expect those who control me to accept my mind.
My mind which desires and designs to its own accord.
Plays to its own beat.
And just yearns to kiss the free skies.
I am alone as usual.
In the decision I take.
Why I take it I have reasons for.
It is a difficult one.
But what matters is -
It is mine.