Saturday, May 24, 2014

Losing my religion

That's me in the corner,
That's me in the spotlight,
Losing my religion,
Trying to keep up with you,
But I don't know if I can do it,
Oh no I've said too much,
I set it up....

I didn't even realise when it happened. Boom! One day it hit me. And then the questions began.
Who am I? What have I become? Is this for me or all for somebody else? Does he even see all this? Does he know? Does he appreciate? 

It's not nice. This place I'm at. A whirlwind in my head. Discomfort in my chest. Legs of lead. Nights devoid of blissful rest. 

It's a sinking boat I tell you. And I sit in it and watch the water gush in, little by little, taking me down bit by bit. I'm uncertain whether I want out. Should I jump into the wild sea and swim to an island? Or should I sit here and wait. To sink. Or will some "magic" save the boat, with one wonderful wave?

I close my eyes and the song plays in my head. Nobody is worth it. Nobody.    


niftynikhil said...

isn't the idea of religion, only to sketch a probability, and an option, a choice?
what happens when the spider finally traps itself in its own sketched net?
the smart one who realizes his sketching techniques, also knows the use of an eraser, what we all innocently call a rubber in India.
it's only when you realize through experience, and spiritual changes, as a result of trial and error, ie, won't you one day learn to uncomplicate the canvas, and leave it to progress toward a clean slate?

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