Oh yes! It takes an external stimulant and I can feel the heat rise from my chest to my head only to vomit out my acidic fire on to another moving being. Sometimes, it doesn't even take an external stimulant to do that. The truth is, there is a lot of anger within. It struggles to find outlets so it can escape from the system but something clogs the holes and it comes out at bad bad times. Oh yes! I've become quite the 'angry young woman' of the present era as opposed to my erstwhile pleasant, smiley, sweet natured self. I'm bitter, irritable, frustrated, exasperated, impatient, snappy, sarcastic, curt, cynical, unforgiving, relentless, extremely critical, mean, immature, rude, petulant and a lot more unpleasant things. I'm so different now that I fail to recognise myself sometimes, and I wonder if I'll ever get back to what I was. What made me like this is unclear and unknown. There could be several factors but nothing that could be a sure winner. Life wouldn't be life if things were that simple.
I am quick to anger and when at the peak, all get the feel of the raging whip. It spares few. And the funny thing is, I detest myself for being like that. It feels like the pleasant side of me is trapped and watching and yelling out to not be such a bitch, but the dark side just doesn't listen. Well, dark sides seldom listen.